Hello, I'm Dr. Fred Horowitz, and most midlifers that I know would benefit from midlife coaching. I certainly have. Not just from coaching but also through being in action and taking advantage of opportunities that opened up for me.
Up until about 3 years ago, I never had any issue about aging - about reaching those key birthdays - 20, 30, 40, 50 and 60. What I'd tell people is that these dates are just numbers.
I know conceptually that all there is, is the present moment and in that moment, everything is perfect. Experientially, it's a different story. My sense is that time is passing by too quickly and I need to make the most of my life now. It seems to me that this is a common experience of midlifers. Midlife coaching can open up new possibilities for relating to aging and coming to terms with our mortality.
Dr. Fred Horowitz's view on leading a life of "integrity"
Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them. Thoreau, Henry David
In my experience of having conversations and getting to know hundreds of individuals, I've come to realize that most of us aren't fulfilled in our lives. We're engaged in activities that don't necessarily nourish the soul. What I mean by that is that we're not connected to who we are at deep level; we're not expressing what's unique for us to express.
At a more fundamental level, ultimately, we don't know who we are. There's a misidentification. Who we consider ourselves to be is our identity, as in "I ________." This causes us to make choices that aren't a good fit for what's really important to us. I call this being out of integrity.
Being in integrity would be conducting our lives in such a way that whatever we did or how we were being would be a natural expression of who we really are.
I can speak to this from my own experience in choosing a profession (dentistry), which wasn't a good fit for me. It took a transformational experience to get me back on track to leading a life of integrity and fulfilment.
The key teachable moments for Dr. Fred Horowitz
In 1980, after completing what's now known as the Landmark Education Forum, I retired from practicing dentistry because of poor vision. That was a 20 year investment - 10 years at McGill University and 10 years of practice. Being a dentist was fine, with the exception of one minor detail - I didn't like working in peoples' mouths. It was too stressful.
Fortunately, I came across the book, "What Color Is Your Parachute" by Richard Bolles and that changed everything. What I discovered is that I most enjoyed teaching and coaching people. From that point forward, I went through 5 career transitions. Each career choice included my favourite two skills - coaching and facilitating.
For 3 years, I was a career coach, working independently using the Bolles principles. At the same time, I created a company called "The Wellness Project," which offered well-being programs to organizations and to the public.
In 1986, I had the opportunity of working for 3 years for Werner Erhard and Associates, the predecessor of Landmark Education. It was a terrific experience. Much of my approach to life and midlife coaching comes from the model that Landmark Education uses.
These experiences opened me up to a new world. I developed an interest in spirituality, especially the Eastern spiritual traditions, like Buddhism.
One of my friends introduced me to TM (Transcendental Meditation) and for 10 years, I meditated for 20 minutes, twice a day. A few years later, I was introduced to the Shambhala Training and the Sivananda Yoga organizations, which have added deeply to the quality of my life. Buddhist meditation and yoga are integral parts of my daily routine. In my midlife coaching sessions, I weave some spiritual notions into the conversations I have with my clients.
Another friend of mine, who was born in India wasn't satisfied with his position as an engineer in a large Montreal-based firm. His heart and spirit weren't into his work. He hired me as his coach. Within 6 months, he left his job and joined a financial services company, which was oriented around a cause. When I left Werner Erhard and Associates and attracted to a cause, I joined the same company. I learned much about managing my own money, while showing people how to make and save it.
The two friends, I refer to above, introduced me to the work of Deepak Chopra. We decided to form a company, Ayurvedic Technologies, Inc., which was based on the principles of Ayurveda, the ancient medical system of India. We developed a strategic alliance with Mr. Chopra and were successful both financially and spiritually.
Dr. Fred Horowitz on choosing "a path with heart"
Whatever I had engaged in since leaving dentistry was enjoyable. However, something was calling me. I felt I wasn't expressing who I really was. So in 1996 I did an internet search on coaching and my first hit was Coach University. Based on the testimonials of teachers and students I interviewed, I enrolled and became a graduate.
The notion of "a path with heart" had resonated with me for many years. It came from the writings of Carlos Castenada, who in his
talked about warriorship. It refers to listening to our hearts rather than our thinking in making wise choices.
Fred Horowitz, "the coach," opens up to working with coaches
I worked with 3 different coaches over a number of years to assist me in the transition process. Without midlife coaching
I would have had a much more difficult time in figuring out my "path with heart".
Hiring a coach wasn't easy for me. Like most people, I have a difficult time allowing people to contribute to me. "What do they know that I don't already know?" "No one is going to tell me what to do!" Here I was, Fred Horowitz, "the coach," strongly recommending people to work with a coach, yet not having his own coach. Once I started working with coaches, I discovered how valuable the process was.
For 12 years, I've been working with senior business owners and executives assisting them in developing a quality business and life. My specialty is dealing with business and personal transition issues. Since turning 60, my focus is on midlife coaching because I can relate to the challenges my clients are dealing with.
Being known as Dr. Fred Horowitz has opened up possibilities and opportunities in my business development. It helps in the way people relate to me, in terms of trust and my professionalism. However, I prefer to be called Fred. In the case of this website, we're using Dr. Frank and Dr. Fred to create a brand.
One of my coaches who I was working with at the start of my coaching career challenged me to start a BNI (Business Network International) chapter in Montreal. There were none. This seemed like a good way to develop business, so I took on the challenge and started one.
The experience was so positive that I went from being the president of the chapter to a BNI director for 5 years. And this is how I came to know Frank Bonkowski (Dr. Frank), who impressed me immediately by his warmth and professionalism. We created a strong bond and came to see we were very much aligned in terms of what kind of future we wanted to create for ourselves. We realized that, in our sixties, it was time to develop some passive revenue streams -- ways of not trading time for money and offering educational products that would make a difference for "Third Agers". An important component of this venture was that we would incorporate fun into the "game" of business we were creating. So, now we're
Dr. Frank Bonkowski
Dr. Fred Horowitz
using our website to develop products and services that will transform the paradigm of aging and retirement. For more about how we built our website and how you can build one too, see
Who is Dr. Fred Horowitz, really?
My passions are running (I've been running consistently for 30 years), yoga, meditation, cycling, weight training, The Alexander Technique, transformation, life long learning and community development. With my background, the midlife coaching that I offer can provide greater fulfilment, freedom, peace and happiness for my clients. These are the issues I'm engaged with myself - not as problems to be solved, but as ongoing development.
As to who is Fred Horowitz, really? I don't really know, except that he's not the identity that he's considered himself to be!
Here are the kind of comments people express when referring to me... "Fred Horowitz is a mensch." "Fred Horowitz is one of the most trustworthy people I know."
My ex-partner in life for 17 years, Louise is my best friend. She's always there for me and I'm grateful for that.
To get an overview of what Dr.Frank and I are addressing check out our